Friday, October 12, 2012

I had an appointment with our RE yesterday...I had an HSG done about 3 weeks ago. That was one of the most painful things I've ever had to go through.  If you have never had one done it to see if your tube or tubes are blocked.  In my case I had my one and only working tube removed in July when I had another eptopic  and emergency surgery for it.  So the result were what I feared. My left tube is blocked and attached to my body weird.  So my RE the only way that we could have our own baby would be IVF.  This makes me sad.  First off we really don't have the money to do this.  I would love to but its still not a guarantee that it would work anyways. After going through losing four babies already it's just something that I really don't think that I could do it again.   So we are focusing on our adoption fund and we are now finished with our trainings for the foster to adopt program.  But somehow I still feel like I'm useless. Like I'm holding my husband back from things that he now wants and things that he could be doing in his life.